Sad, yet happy

When I left Paris, I felt a bit melancholy. Itís always difficult for me to leave behind my beau. Living apart isnít easy on me, but right now itís the only solution we have. When I arrived in Florence and the tassista (taxi driver) took me through the streets of my beloved city, I wasnít as happy as usual. I felt even sadder that I was so far away. If I couldíve gotten back on a plane and returned to Paris, I think I wouldíve done so.

This morning, however, when I went out for a run, I wasnít in the mood to go out. It wasnít until I was walking across Ponte alle Grazie and looked at the Arno with San Miniato on the hill above the pastel-colored buildings that I felt my heart fill up again.

I began to run and my sadness seemed to dissipate. With each breath, I took in my beloved city a little bit more. I felt the combination of sadness and happiness present in my heart, but I didnít feel like I needed to do anything. I was OK with the combination even though they arenít complimentary.

Iím only staying for a short time in Florence and Iím beginning to wonder if I should stay a few days longer. My beloved city always helps me to feel stronger and more connected to my heart. Itís as if the whispers inside of me become louder when I'm here.

This morning it was raining a little bit, which definitely matched my feelings, but now the sun has peeked out and the patches of blue sky have become even larger. The clouds have almost all disappeared. Sometimes I wonder if the weather matches my mood or if my mood follows the weather. I feel sad not to be with my beau, but I am so happy to be in my beloved city because I have missed it so much these past two weeks.

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